Wednesday, May 03, 2006
sounds dirty, but looks purty cool....
The Rasterbator is a web service which creates huge, rasterized images from any picture. The rasterized images can be printed and assembled into extremely cool looking posters up to 20 meters in size.
got a new digital camera...
bought a new digital camera yesterday - at Aldi, of all places. 8.1 megapixels, baybee! The Traveler DC-8300 - gotta charge up the batteries before i can test it out, but it looks like i got a great deal...
goofy jokes...
a thread on TotalFark reminded me of some goofy (read: STUPID) jokes i enjoy, as well as adding some new ones to the list...
Two muffins are baking in the oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Damn, it's hot in here, isn't it?" The other muffin says, "Holy shit, a talking muffin!"
Q: What do you call a female turtle?
A: A clitortoise.
What's brown and sticky?
A stick!
What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
A pirate walks into a bar with a captain's wheel down his pants.
He walks up to the bar and the bartender says "What’s with the steering wheel down your pants?"
Pirate says "Yargh! It's driving me nuts!"
A pirate with a peg leg, a hook for a hand and an eyepatch walks into a bar and the barman sees him and says, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while, where'd you get that peg leg?"
"I lost me leg to a shark while out at sea", the pirate replies.
"Oh, well, what happened to your hand? That hook is new too."
"Arrh, I lost me hand to a shark as well", answered the pirate.
"Wow, well you didn't have the eyepatch either. Did a shark get your eye too?"
"No," the pirate said, "the first day I had the hook, a bird pooped in me eye."
A man goes to the doctor. He says, "Doc, you gotta check my leg. Something's wrong. Just put your ear up to my thigh, you'll hear it!"
The doctor cautiously placed his ear to the man's thigh only to hear, "Gimme 20 bucks, I really need 20 bucks."
"I've never seen or heard anything like this before, how long has this been going on?" asked the doctor.
"That's nothing Doc. Put your ear to my knee."
The doctor put his ear to the man's knee and heard it say, "Man, I really need 10 dollars, just lend me 10 bucks!!"
"Sir," said the dumbfounded Doctor, "I really don't know what to tell you. I've never encountered anything like this before."
"Wait Doc, that's not it. There's more, just put your ear up to my ankle," the man urged.
The doctor did as the man said and heard the ankle plead, "Please, I just need 5 dollars. Lend me 5 bucks if you will."
"I have no idea what to tell you," the doctor said. "There's nothing about it in my books," he said.
"However, I can make a well educated guess though. Based on life experience I can tell you that your leg seems to be broke in three places."
A blond goes to the doctor and complains she isn't feeling well. The doctor discovers carrots in her ears and lettuce in her nose.
The blonde asks "Doctor, what's wrong with me?"
The doctor replies "You aren't eating right."
Two muffins are baking in the oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Damn, it's hot in here, isn't it?" The other muffin says, "Holy shit, a talking muffin!"
Q: What do you call a female turtle?
A: A clitortoise.
What's brown and sticky?
A stick!
What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
A pirate walks into a bar with a captain's wheel down his pants.
He walks up to the bar and the bartender says "What’s with the steering wheel down your pants?"
Pirate says "Yargh! It's driving me nuts!"
A pirate with a peg leg, a hook for a hand and an eyepatch walks into a bar and the barman sees him and says, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while, where'd you get that peg leg?"
"I lost me leg to a shark while out at sea", the pirate replies.
"Oh, well, what happened to your hand? That hook is new too."
"Arrh, I lost me hand to a shark as well", answered the pirate.
"Wow, well you didn't have the eyepatch either. Did a shark get your eye too?"
"No," the pirate said, "the first day I had the hook, a bird pooped in me eye."
A man goes to the doctor. He says, "Doc, you gotta check my leg. Something's wrong. Just put your ear up to my thigh, you'll hear it!"
The doctor cautiously placed his ear to the man's thigh only to hear, "Gimme 20 bucks, I really need 20 bucks."
"I've never seen or heard anything like this before, how long has this been going on?" asked the doctor.
"That's nothing Doc. Put your ear to my knee."
The doctor put his ear to the man's knee and heard it say, "Man, I really need 10 dollars, just lend me 10 bucks!!"
"Sir," said the dumbfounded Doctor, "I really don't know what to tell you. I've never encountered anything like this before."
"Wait Doc, that's not it. There's more, just put your ear up to my ankle," the man urged.
The doctor did as the man said and heard the ankle plead, "Please, I just need 5 dollars. Lend me 5 bucks if you will."
"I have no idea what to tell you," the doctor said. "There's nothing about it in my books," he said.
"However, I can make a well educated guess though. Based on life experience I can tell you that your leg seems to be broke in three places."
A blond goes to the doctor and complains she isn't feeling well. The doctor discovers carrots in her ears and lettuce in her nose.
The blonde asks "Doctor, what's wrong with me?"
The doctor replies "You aren't eating right."
if i have an aneurysm in the next 24 hours, sue Hewlett-Packard!
ARGH!!!!!!! like the subj: line says - if i have an aneurysm in the next 24 hours, sue Hewlett-Packard! - they're about to cause my head to explode!!
the background:
so, i sent my laptop off to get fixed last month - it went dead on me. i'd try turning it on - nothing. it was dead. so i had it checked out by the geek squad - was gonna cost $500+ to replace the motherboard. that was quite an incentive to hunt down the paperwork to see if it was still under warranty - and it was, till May 1. so i called hp, they sent me a container to Fed Ex it to them, they repaired it and Fed Ex'd it back. i'd noticed the package i got looked like it'd been knocked around a few times, but figured the specialized foam packaging took care of it. so i open it up, the paperwork says it's been repaired - woo hoo! so i turn it on - i hear it power up, but nothing on the display. okay, i'm not gonna freak out, perhaps they drained the battery - so i let it charge up, but got the same results. argh. so i call hp, they send another Fed Ex box, i ship it off to them. they send me a link to check the progress of repair, etc...
that leads us to today:
i go to hp's website to see the status of my repairs, and find:
Warranty status: out of warranty / Service charge: $698.00
what?!?!? excuse me?!?!? that's a bit different than the Warranty status: in warranty / Service charge: $0.00 that i'd previously seen...
so i call up the 800 number. i always wondered about those people that ranted about call centers based in india - today i got a lil taste of the frustration. although, when it comes down to it, i know it's not the fact that i talked to people in india that caused this TREMENDOUS FUCK-UP - it's the fact that HP DOESN'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ITS CUSTOMERS.
(errr, can ya tell i'm a bit flustered/frustrated/annoyed/pissed?!?)
so, we go through the explanation about how this is the second time i've sent the laptop to them, they said it worked when they shipped it out last time but when i got it, it didn't work. and i explain it again, and again. i give her case numbers, serial numbers, order numbers, blah blah blah. i get put on hold. she tells me that there was damage to the motherboard, video-something and something else. i tell her that, according to HP, it was sent back repaired. i get put on hold again. then she adds a couple other things that are wrong with it (can't remember now) and that this was accidental damage and that i was not covered with an accidental damage warranty - if i want the machine repaired, it'll be $698.00. i say something else (can't remember specifics, probably just repeating what i'd previously said, since i seemed to say everything 5 or 6 times) and she puts me on hold again. she tells me that there appears to be a spill in the keyboard and that i was not covered with an accidental damage warranty - if i want the machine repaired, it'll be $698.00. it was like every time she put me on hold, they found something new to justify not fixing the machine. i explain to her that i'm not going to pay $698.00 to repair a machine that cost about that much and that won't be under warranty when i get it. she asks if i want it shipped back, unrepaired - i said yes. she asks if i want it shipped back, unrepaired - i said yes, AGAIN. i spent a total of 29:56 on the phone (gotta love that timer on the phone) and they're shipping back a machine that doesn't work.
so now i'm wondering if it got damaged in transit from HP by Fed Ex and wonder if i'm gonna hafta file a claim against Fed Ex - argh!!! the more i think about it, the more i realize how mangled up that box was.
this whole thing's been a huge clusterfuck from the beginning, and i'm thinking i might need an extra Xanax or 6...
the background:
so, i sent my laptop off to get fixed last month - it went dead on me. i'd try turning it on - nothing. it was dead. so i had it checked out by the geek squad - was gonna cost $500+ to replace the motherboard. that was quite an incentive to hunt down the paperwork to see if it was still under warranty - and it was, till May 1. so i called hp, they sent me a container to Fed Ex it to them, they repaired it and Fed Ex'd it back. i'd noticed the package i got looked like it'd been knocked around a few times, but figured the specialized foam packaging took care of it. so i open it up, the paperwork says it's been repaired - woo hoo! so i turn it on - i hear it power up, but nothing on the display. okay, i'm not gonna freak out, perhaps they drained the battery - so i let it charge up, but got the same results. argh. so i call hp, they send another Fed Ex box, i ship it off to them. they send me a link to check the progress of repair, etc...
that leads us to today:
i go to hp's website to see the status of my repairs, and find:
Warranty status: out of warranty / Service charge: $698.00
what?!?!? excuse me?!?!? that's a bit different than the Warranty status: in warranty / Service charge: $0.00 that i'd previously seen...
so i call up the 800 number. i always wondered about those people that ranted about call centers based in india - today i got a lil taste of the frustration. although, when it comes down to it, i know it's not the fact that i talked to people in india that caused this TREMENDOUS FUCK-UP - it's the fact that HP DOESN'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ITS CUSTOMERS.
(errr, can ya tell i'm a bit flustered/frustrated/annoyed/pissed?!?)
so, we go through the explanation about how this is the second time i've sent the laptop to them, they said it worked when they shipped it out last time but when i got it, it didn't work. and i explain it again, and again. i give her case numbers, serial numbers, order numbers, blah blah blah. i get put on hold. she tells me that there was damage to the motherboard, video-something and something else. i tell her that, according to HP, it was sent back repaired. i get put on hold again. then she adds a couple other things that are wrong with it (can't remember now) and that this was accidental damage and that i was not covered with an accidental damage warranty - if i want the machine repaired, it'll be $698.00. i say something else (can't remember specifics, probably just repeating what i'd previously said, since i seemed to say everything 5 or 6 times) and she puts me on hold again. she tells me that there appears to be a spill in the keyboard and that i was not covered with an accidental damage warranty - if i want the machine repaired, it'll be $698.00. it was like every time she put me on hold, they found something new to justify not fixing the machine. i explain to her that i'm not going to pay $698.00 to repair a machine that cost about that much and that won't be under warranty when i get it. she asks if i want it shipped back, unrepaired - i said yes. she asks if i want it shipped back, unrepaired - i said yes, AGAIN. i spent a total of 29:56 on the phone (gotta love that timer on the phone) and they're shipping back a machine that doesn't work.
so now i'm wondering if it got damaged in transit from HP by Fed Ex and wonder if i'm gonna hafta file a claim against Fed Ex - argh!!! the more i think about it, the more i realize how mangled up that box was.
this whole thing's been a huge clusterfuck from the beginning, and i'm thinking i might need an extra Xanax or 6...
Sunday, April 30, 2006
2006 ICAAN Scavenger Hunt
On Saturday I took part in a scavenger hunt to benefit ICAAN - the Indiana Canine Assistant & Adolescent Network - they train assistance dogs and do good spiffy things (see for yourself on their website)...
So, Stephanie, Steph, Amy and i formed a team - "The Escalator Accident" - Steph came up with it, and i'm still not quite sure where her mind was when thinking it up, but okay. *8-)
We took pix with Steph's camera, so i'll just send ya to her Flickr set for more details on the excitement... http://www.flickr.com/photos/electrasteph/sets/72057594120250633/
it was lots of fun, very well organized, and the rain held off so that we could complete the race - i'd definitely like to do it again!
So, Stephanie, Steph, Amy and i formed a team - "The Escalator Accident" - Steph came up with it, and i'm still not quite sure where her mind was when thinking it up, but okay. *8-)
We took pix with Steph's camera, so i'll just send ya to her Flickr set for more details on the excitement... http://www.flickr.com/photos/electrasteph/sets/72057594120250633/
it was lots of fun, very well organized, and the rain held off so that we could complete the race - i'd definitely like to do it again!
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