alrighty...so, back to the suckage that is work...the insurance is gonna cost more and cover less, leaving me to ponder if i can afford to have tests done that the neurologist wants...and then kim calls a little meeting to give us some info about our raises - she STILL doesn't have the paperwork to process for our raises, nor does she know how much $ we'll be getting. but one thing she DOES know - we'll get half of our raise now, half in july. err, 'scuse me? yeah, so basically they're gonna keep 25% of our raise - although who knows, maybe in july they'll just tell us to fuck off. so half my brain is ready to blow the fucking place up, the other half is telling me to chill and be thankful that i HAVE a job and that it's not minimum wage, and that i'm not getting a pay CUT...argh.

perhaps it's the book i'm currently reading that's having an effect on my temperament, and my feeling fortunate to have the job that i do. Nickel and Dimed: On (Not) Getting By in America by Barbara Ehrenreich is very interesting - ehrenreich tried living as the working poor do, at a variety of jobs in a variety of places - from being a "merry maid" to working as a waitress and at a wal-mart. and she found just how impossible it is to live on what's supposedly a liveable wage, and the stress involved in trying to make ends meet. thankfully, i'm not in that much of a hole, but i'm still not very well off. it's made me think about the future and what i should be doing - is the trader going to fold and leave me unemployed? will i need to find another job in the near future? should i move in with mom and lower my expenses for a while? *shrug*