Monday, May 15, 2006

Antiques Roadshow Drinking Game!

ummm, i think some people may be risking alcohol poisoning.....

From tonkin on TotalFark:

All players drink when/if:

1. The item is worth less because it has been refinished or repaired. Drink twice if it's one of the Keno brothers breaking that news to the collector. Drink 3 times if the item is worth less than 20% of what it would have been worth had it not been refinished or repaired.


2. Anyone says "veneer." (In tribute to Frasier.)


3. Someone uses the word "provenance." Drink twice if the appraiser says the item is more valuable because the collector has documentation of the provenance.


4. The collector found it in the attic/basement of their house when they moved in.


5. The item belonged to someone now dead and the collector had asked for it.


6. The appraiser says "This is one of the best examples of [fill in the blank] I've ever seen!" Drink twice if s/he goes on to say the item is "impossible to value" or "priceless" because it's so special.


7. When asked, "Do you know how much it's worth?," the collector says "I have no idea!" [Must be exact quote.]


8. If it's a letter written by a former president or Civil War hero.


9. If an item is worth more than $100,000. Drink twice if the item is not furniture or jewelry.


10. Anyone is seen wearing a bow tie.


11. If the collector is a child. Drink twice if the child actually seems to know anything about what s/he has brought.


12. If an item is a fake, replica or forgery. Drink twice if it's worth more because it is a fake, replica or forgery. Drink twice if the owner claims that s/he knew it was a fake, replica or forgery, but just wanted to know if it was worth anything anyway.


13. If the collector says "well we'll still enjoy it" when s/he finds out the item is worthless.


14. If the collector paid less than 1/10th the value of the item, or found it. [Inherited items do not count in this category.]


15. If the collector says, "well, I guess I won't be using it as a [planter, serving dish, or other inappropriate use] any more!" after finding out what an item is worth.

16. Any "Signed" item made by L. C. Tiffany, take a drink. Must be signed. (if I see one more Tiffany lamp I'll puke)


17. Take a MINIMUM of 3 drinks if you spot ANYONE wearing a tie with a big fat ugly knot similar to the one worn by the shows' host. (I mean really, where do they get these people.)

Additional items:
Drink if:

* the owner of the item claims to have no idea as to the value of the item.? Drink twice if they give an amount that is hideously low ("Oh, I don't know.....a hundred dollars?" for a Tiffany lamp, for example.)

* the item brought in is larger than the trunk of an average car

* the item is from the Civil War

* the appraiser expresses his/her joy that the owner brought in the item

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