where's my rocking chair?

sheesh - tickets went on sale last weekend for an upcoming indianapolis appearance of R.E.M. (oct 20 at the murat) - i'd be tempted to go, 'cept for two things:

#1: the damned tickets are too expensive - the cheap seats are $49.50

#2: probably more importantly, it'd make me feel too damned old! just hearing they're in town sent me back in time - september '89, senior year of high school, market square arena, seeing 'em in concert with my boyfriend - yeah, THAT long ago...eeeeeeeeeeek!

productive saturday...

got lots done today - lots of miscellaneous errands accomplished...got the new bank card in the mail, so it was a trip to the bank to get the new PIN set up...then a trip to the library to pick up books/cds on hold...

then i harassed kat at work - my video eeg on thursday/friday has left residue on my head, and it's been itching like crazy...figured she'd have stuff at work (conveniently named "Lori's Hair Care") that might be a bit more capable than what's sitting in my bathroom - so i got some sort of goop put in my hair, sat under a dryer with a plastic bag on my head for a while, then rinsed it out and even managed to get my hair trimmed. most of the color's gone from my hair, i suspect kat will be wanting me to be her ginuea pig soon - she'd mentioned perhaps trying red sometime, we'll see about that one...

more to write about, but i'm whupped - time for some sleep...

one day is different than 24 hours...

when ya tell me to show up for a one day eeg, i figure i get there on thursday, i leave on thursday...well, i get there, and they let me know that i'm spending the night - whoo hoo! thinking i'd only be there till the evening, i didn't pack an away bag or anything. oh well, shit happens, we'll get over it. wish they'd have said a "24 hour eeg" tho - they've called them that previously, and i would've realized i'd be spending the night

of course i was majorly stressed before getting there, major traffic along the way, difficulty finding parking and so on and so forth. so we finally get to my room, they check my vitals - blood pressure's 196/89. not a big surprise actually, i could FEEL the stress coursing through my body, even though high blood pressure is one of the few disorders i actually DON'T have. so i sit around and wait for the EEG tech to show up with her glue gun and camera and 298,713 electrodes to attach to me and viola! get in bed and act like everything's normal!

mom stayed with me and of course the only time it seemed like anything strange happened was WHILE they were putting the electrodes on, before i was actually hooked up to the computer - a little deja vu episode, perhaps a slight complex partial seizure, but it wasn't recorded, of course. the doc will get all the info and see if i had seizure activity that i wasn't aware of (perhaps in my sleep) and we'll go from there...

kinda bummed i don't have the energy to make it to games night this evening, but i'm still wiped out and my hair is still all skanky from all the glue and crap they put in it and i just need to chill...

evil bastard cocksucking motherfuckers...

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

stuck in my head...

ever get a song stuck in your head, for no apparent reason at all, and the only thing ya can do to attempt to remedy the situation is put it on the cd player and hit the repeat button until it just disappears from your consciousness? that's happening to me...

the song?

"Down To One" by Melissa Etheridge

*shrug* consciously, i'm not feeling particularly depressed or anything, but i think the subconscious is a bit lonely...

testing 1 2 3...

well, the tests for deciding whether or not i'm a surgical candidate won't start up till next month, but this thursday i'll be going in for a one day video EEG to see if they can discern anything about this last bout of seizure weirdness...i hope we can get some of this shit figured out - i really don't like feeling this way...

apparently, there's not a neuropsych doc covered by cigna within 100 miles, so i'll be going to the one at IU and paying 20% out of pocket - depends on who ya ask tho, one person says the tests'll cost $1000, another says $2400...oh well, it's only money, right?

trying to remember symptoms...

in trying to remember symptoms of things that have been happening with me since the last bout of seizures, here's the list thus far:

#1: having difficulty remembering things...

#2: ummmmm....lemme think about it, i know there were a few more to add to the list...

mid-weekend post...

not too much going on right now - kat and i did dinner at golden corral and wandered around meijer (jeez, the excitement of a saturday night!!) and now she's using my computer to check her email...

group on thursday was interesting - charles asked me if i'd thought about when i wanted to leave the intensive outpatient program. i was up front with him, it's been on my mind recently, and i honestly don't know what i think about it - part of me's thinks it's time to go, part of me doesn't - seems like the times before when i've thought it was time to go have been when things started to fall apart, and with the stuff i'm looking at coming up with testing for possible surgery and all, perhaps i should just stick with it a bit longer. or maybe not. hell, i don't know. in looking at what to do afterwards though, we talked about what group i may want to join up with - i'd previously been in the stress management group that met once a week, but i'm not sure if that's what i want to return to. charles suggested that perhaps a ptsd group might be a good fit - huh?!? post traumatic stress disorder?!? he explained how it may be relevant to me, how my seizures and my dealing with them could be seen as traumatic events and the ptsd group might be helpful - so i'm going to "audit" the group next week - still doing IOP, but i'll go to the PTSD group on tuesday and sit in the background and check it out, see if that's where i want to be. we'll give it a shot...

Kurt Vonnegut's got it figured out...

Kurt Vonnegut's figured out Dubya...check out this quote from a recent column (hell, read the whole column, it's great!):

"And do you know why I think he is so pissed off at Arabs? They invented algebra. Arabs also invented the numbers we use, including a symbol for nothing, which nobody else had ever had before. You think Arabs are dumb? Try doing long division with Roman numerals.

We're spreading democracy, are we? Same way European explorers brought Christianity to the Indians, what we now call "Native Americans.""

my Yiddish lesson for the day...

Holly emailed me and told me that my description of not being quite back to normal is ongepotchket in Yiddish...hmmm...ongepotchket...a google search reveals the common definition to be "Messed up, slapped together without form, excessively and unesthetically decorated" - that's not quite the way i'm feeling, but i suppose it somewhat gets the message across...

this weekend flew by...

perhaps it's that misperception of time thing i'm still dealing with since those last few seizures, but this weekend seemed to go a LOT faster than usual...

hung out with kat & jake friday night and saturday, played games and watched movies (both of em were amazed i hadn't seen Rat Race - funny movie)

sheesh, i can't believe i start week #13 of group on monday morning - better get to bed...

Friday the 13th...

good thing i'm not terribly superstitious - it'll really SUCK if today goes even worse than the rest of this week has simply because it's friday the 13th...

i'm still not back to "normal" - the lori standard of normal, that is...is it possible to be post-ictal for a whole week?!? not sure, but that's what it feels like...it's as if i'm in that dense fog that surrounds me after a seizure - the fog that usually lasts a couple of hours has gone been going on for days now...

meanwhile i'm having to deal with doctor's offices and insurance companies and all sorts of fucked up situations while my head isn't quite screwed on right - i KNOW i should be having an EEG done, cuz it's obvious to me that there's something not quite right goin on, but there seems to be some disagreement over who and where to do it, et cetera, et cetera...ARGH

whole lotta shakin'

...after tuesday's seizure, more weirdness abounded - smaller seizures on wednesday and thursday...saw the neurologist today, we're switching meds and going in for more tests - fun fun fun!!!

Category III - The Regular Jo(e)

You are the quintessential standard conjured by the word 'Friend'.


What Type of Social Entity are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

whole lotta shakin goin on...

yup, had a seizure early tuesday morning (around 3am), then had some more weirdness happen during the day tuesday - fun fun fun. not sure how this'll effect the testing/surgery evaluation - damn, i shoulda just gone right to the hospital and got hooked up to an EEG. it's possible that the birth control pills i take for PCOS are interfering with the lamictal that dr. mohan's prescribed - i'd been off of them for a few months cuz my rx ran out and just recently started em back up again - so i need to give the gyn a call. also need to talk to the shrink about getting a better pill to help me sleep - the sonata is helping me GET to sleep, but i'm still waking up numerous times throughout the night...

ugh, it's all so frustrating. and while the seizure itself wasn't that bad, the aftereffects seem to be hanging around a lot more than usual - still feeling kinda squirrelly.

Which Eddie Izzard line are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

information on food stamps in indiana...

seems i was given a bit of misinformation when told about the food stamps program in indiana, so here's a bit of a clarification for those that may be interested...

from the Hoosier Works Card FAQ:


not everybody gets their food stamp benefits on the first of the month - just so happens that i do cuz my last name starts with a B:

Food Stamp benefits will be available on one of the first five days of the month, according to the first letter of your last name:

A - B 1st
C - D 2nd
E - G 3rd
H - I 4th
J - L 5th
M - N 6th
O - R 7th
S 8th
T - V 9th
W - Z 10th

All benefits will be available at 8:00 a.m. Central Time on the benefit date.

waitaminute - it says they're available in the 1st 5 days of the month, but then lists 10 days? not a clue what that means, but that's what i copy/pasted from the link - i just hope your last name starts with a letter between A and L, cuz if you're an M through Z, i dunno what to tell ya...



and apparently the balance can roll over, tho i was told it would not and to spend the amount i had before the end of the month:

Q: What if I only receive a small amount of food stamp benefits; can I let the amount increase over a few months before I use them?
A: Yes. You may let them accumulate. Food stamp benefits will be available for 365 days from issuance



To check the balance on your card 24/7, call toll free at 1-877-768-5098


i think those are the major questions people have once they get the card...there's my public service announcement for today. *8-)

wow - a post that ISN'T about depression!!

latest book i've read: Eats, shoots & leaves : the zero tolerance approach to punctuation - yes, i suppose i'm exposing my extreme nerdity, but this book was great! i know - ya hafta be quite the loser to deliberately read a book about punctuation FOR FUN, but oh well - beats reading all these self-help books i've been recommended to read in therapy...

anyhoo - Eats, shoots & leaves - definitely recommended!

granted, the author would dislike this blog for the heavy use of ellipses and lack of capital letters, but oh well, it's my blog... *8-P

argh...

it appears that the alternator's gone out on my vehicle - friggin' wonderful - i have less than forty dollars to my name and now the car's going to shit...

happy happy joy joy

random scary website post...

i won't post the scary pic here, but click on the text below to see the dude with the world's record for ear hair!

Radhakant Bajpai of Naya Ganj, Uttar Pradesh, India, has hair sprouting from the centre of his outer ears (middle of the pinna) that measures an incredible 13.2 cm (5.19 in) at its longest point. The length of the 50-year-old's pinna pelt was confirmed by medical examiner Dr. R P Gupta.

"Making it to Guinness World Records is indeed a special occasion for me and my family," said Radhakant. "God has been very kind to me."