Partial - now, i dunno exactly why they do this shit, but that's they call it. i suppose it's a politically correct condensation of the term "partially fucking insane" - i'm now spending 6 hours a day in therapy trying to get out of this depression...
thus far? day 1 made it worse. it's weird enough to enter a group therapy room with 11 strangers and be the only one that hasn't a clue what's going on. then to have all these code words and inside jokes flying about makes ya feel even more left out. then to not even have a chance to say more than two sentences about myself and the fact that i desperately want nothing more than to kill myself really sucks.
what did i get out of today? well, there are other people out there that are depressed. this, i already knew.
i'm thinking i'll give it one more try tomorrow - maybe it was just one of those weird flukes that meant i didn't get a chance to talk - but i certainly didn't get a good feeling in those initial six hours...
Monday, May 24, 2004
Sunday, May 23, 2004
one friggin point...
we lost by one friggin point tonight - "we" being the Fever, at my 2nd ever attended Fever game (and the 2nd attended in the past 3 days!) one minute left and the score was tied, and the Mystics ended up winning by one point...it was a nailbiter for sure...
kim's a sweetie - i offered to pay her for my ticket, but she said it was on her...we were right behind the Mystics bench...those season ticket thangs are cool...someday i'll have the money for that sort of thing...
kim's a sweetie - i offered to pay her for my ticket, but she said it was on her...we were right behind the Mystics bench...those season ticket thangs are cool...someday i'll have the money for that sort of thing...
current reads from the library...
i'm in the midst of reading three books from the library right now...
The book on Bush : how George W. (mis)leads America - Eric Alterman - it's taking me FOREVER to read this book...i'm about halfway through it, but it just gets too depressing reading about how Dubya's fucked up this country, so i put it down for a while...i think i've renewed it through the website about three times now...
Nam June Paik : video time, video space - Nam June Paik - during a late night trip to meijer, kat and i stumbled across some art prints, which got us talking about favorite artists. i told her about Paik, but any description i could give wouldn't give his art justice...hell, the book doesn't do his sculptures justice, but it'll give her an idea of the weird sort of stuff i like. i'm also re-reading the book in the hopes of getting re-energized and perhaps a bit artistically motivated - maybe that'll help with the job search...
Seizure free : from epilepsy to brain surgery, I survived, and you can, too! - Leanne Chilton - interesting read, so far, tho i must say i'm annoyed at the little errors and such. Chilton needs a better editor. it's good to have a book that's not all bogged down in clinical terms and such, but typographical and other errors just irk me...
The book on Bush : how George W. (mis)leads America - Eric Alterman - it's taking me FOREVER to read this book...i'm about halfway through it, but it just gets too depressing reading about how Dubya's fucked up this country, so i put it down for a while...i think i've renewed it through the website about three times now...
Nam June Paik : video time, video space - Nam June Paik - during a late night trip to meijer, kat and i stumbled across some art prints, which got us talking about favorite artists. i told her about Paik, but any description i could give wouldn't give his art justice...hell, the book doesn't do his sculptures justice, but it'll give her an idea of the weird sort of stuff i like. i'm also re-reading the book in the hopes of getting re-energized and perhaps a bit artistically motivated - maybe that'll help with the job search...
Seizure free : from epilepsy to brain surgery, I survived, and you can, too! - Leanne Chilton - interesting read, so far, tho i must say i'm annoyed at the little errors and such. Chilton needs a better editor. it's good to have a book that's not all bogged down in clinical terms and such, but typographical and other errors just irk me...
Saturday, May 22, 2004
busy busy weekend...
my cousin joanie's daughter ashley graduated from high school last night, so we attended the open house this afternoon - can't believe the little baby that i babysat as a teenager is headed to IU in the fall...
afterwards i headed over to kat's to try and help her get stuff settled with the new place she's supposed to be moving into - that ain't happening, it's a shithole, nothing like the model they showed us. back to square one, finding her a new place to live ASAP...moving is such a pain in the ass...
kat yelled and screamed so much at the game last night that she's lost most of her voice...so we went to the abbey tonight for some hot tea to soothe her throat...jacob quickly lost interest with the place once he was done with his mocha mousse cake, but i suppose we should've expected that - the scene's a bit too drab for an 11 year old...
if it weren't enough that i attended my first Fever game on friday, i'll be attending another one tomorrow!! kim said she had an extra ticket, so we're meeting for dinner beforehand and then it's off to the game...pretty cool...once i win the lottery, i'll have to get season tickets or something...
afterwards i headed over to kat's to try and help her get stuff settled with the new place she's supposed to be moving into - that ain't happening, it's a shithole, nothing like the model they showed us. back to square one, finding her a new place to live ASAP...moving is such a pain in the ass...
kat yelled and screamed so much at the game last night that she's lost most of her voice...so we went to the abbey tonight for some hot tea to soothe her throat...jacob quickly lost interest with the place once he was done with his mocha mousse cake, but i suppose we should've expected that - the scene's a bit too drab for an 11 year old...
if it weren't enough that i attended my first Fever game on friday, i'll be attending another one tomorrow!! kim said she had an extra ticket, so we're meeting for dinner beforehand and then it's off to the game...pretty cool...once i win the lottery, i'll have to get season tickets or something...
Friday, May 21, 2004
a festive evening...
kat and i took her son jacob to the home opener for the Indiana Fever - first game i've attended...pretty damned cool, i'll definitely hafta go again...saw a lot of familiar faces in the crowd, but couldn't put names to them - i think i need the shirt i saw on a chick at the softball game i attended a couple weeks ago - it read "That's okay - I don't remember your name either"...certainly a must for my brain damaged self...
afterwards, it was off to Ritter's for frozen custard - yummy. damn, now i can't seem to locate my meter for checking my blood sugar. darn. ;-)
afterwards, it was off to Ritter's for frozen custard - yummy. damn, now i can't seem to locate my meter for checking my blood sugar. darn. ;-)
Thursday, May 20, 2004
"Every time you masturbate... God kills a kitten"
Small, brown kitten
Look at it, take a
deep look into this poor things eyes. Every
time you masturbate you kill one of him, or
her. God knows what it is, but it's gonna be
dead soon, because of you. You sick, sick boy
(or girl).
Every time you masturbate... which kitten does god kill?
brought to you by Quizilla
Shrek 2...
kat and i did dinner and a movie tonight - both of us unsure of what to eat or what to go see...we did dinner at Uno
after dinner, we made a quick pit stop into Target - when we got out of the car we saw a really spiffy rainbow - not drop-dead gorgeous or anything, but still cool. rainbows rock...
then we went and saw Shrek 2 - good movie, definitely gonna hafta check it out again when it comes out on DVD because i suspect we missed a lot of inside jokes. the scene where Antonio Banderas (aka Puss In Boots) licks himself is classic, tho i think Kat was a bit jealous...(not cuz she can't lick herself, but cuz she'd rather be the one licking Antonio - well, at least that's what i think) *8-)
after dinner, we made a quick pit stop into Target - when we got out of the car we saw a really spiffy rainbow - not drop-dead gorgeous or anything, but still cool. rainbows rock...
then we went and saw Shrek 2 - good movie, definitely gonna hafta check it out again when it comes out on DVD because i suspect we missed a lot of inside jokes. the scene where Antonio Banderas (aka Puss In Boots) licks himself is classic, tho i think Kat was a bit jealous...(not cuz she can't lick herself, but cuz she'd rather be the one licking Antonio - well, at least that's what i think) *8-)
Wednesday, May 19, 2004
I felt a Funeral, in my Brain - Emily Dickinson
(can't really explain it, but this has always been a favorite poem of mine...)
I felt a Funeral, in my Brain,
And Mourners to and fro
Kept treading--treading--till it seemed
That Sense was breaking through--
And when they all were seated,
A Service, like a Drum--
Kept beating--beating--till I thought
My Mind was going numb--
And then I heard them lift a Box
And creak across my Soul
With those same Boots of Lead, again,
Then Space--began to toll,
As all the Heavens were a Bell,
And Being, but an Ear,
And I, and Silence, some strange Race
Wrecked, solitary, here--
And then a Plank in Reason, broke,
And I dropped down, and down--
And hit a World, at every plunge,
And Finished knowing--then--
-- Emily Dickinson
I felt a Funeral, in my Brain,
And Mourners to and fro
Kept treading--treading--till it seemed
That Sense was breaking through--
And when they all were seated,
A Service, like a Drum--
Kept beating--beating--till I thought
My Mind was going numb--
And then I heard them lift a Box
And creak across my Soul
With those same Boots of Lead, again,
Then Space--began to toll,
As all the Heavens were a Bell,
And Being, but an Ear,
And I, and Silence, some strange Race
Wrecked, solitary, here--
And then a Plank in Reason, broke,
And I dropped down, and down--
And hit a World, at every plunge,
And Finished knowing--then--
-- Emily Dickinson
Tuesday, May 18, 2004
Bloomington...
Kat and i made a little road trip to Bloomington today...it was really nice until *WHAM!* i got hit by a wave of depression on the ride home. being unemployed really sucks. i feel completely and utterly useless.
Monday, May 17, 2004
the idea that'll make me a bazillionaire...
well, the initial prototypes of my magic wand that'll make everything happy have not quite worked as planned, so i suppose i'll have to get working on the back-up idea...
The Magic Remote Control will allow you to rewind and replay the spiffy parts of your life, as well as fast-forward through the really sucky ones. Want everything to just chill for a while? Hit the pause button, and hit it again when you're ready to resume life on this crazy-ass merry-go-round called life.
i think we could all use something like that...
The Magic Remote Control will allow you to rewind and replay the spiffy parts of your life, as well as fast-forward through the really sucky ones. Want everything to just chill for a while? Hit the pause button, and hit it again when you're ready to resume life on this crazy-ass merry-go-round called life.
i think we could all use something like that...
i've been shot...
...but it's just a minor flesh wound, really...
the hand surgeon gave me a cortisone shot today...hafta keep up with the physical therapy - my not going last week made that abundantly clear...my handwriting is becoming more and more atrocious and my wrist is very weak...
the hand surgeon gave me a cortisone shot today...hafta keep up with the physical therapy - my not going last week made that abundantly clear...my handwriting is becoming more and more atrocious and my wrist is very weak...
Sunday, May 16, 2004
nice weekend...
like a weekend even makes a fucking difference to my unemployed ass. *8-) alas, i do seem to see more people and do more things on the weekends...
saturday we went to my aunt sherry's house - to celebrate birthdays - my mom's, and my cousin's daughter's...jessica just turned 11 and went apeshit over anything and everything PINK...all her presents were either pink, a book, or Hillary Duff related!!!!!!! omigod!!!! there aren't enough exclamation points to adequately describe the excitement of preteen girls!!!!
the good thing about visiting aunt sherry - she's got all the grandbabies in the family...my branch of the family tree being a bit barren, we get to go over there and see my cousins and all their babies...then they get tired and cranky and we get to go home. *8-)
here i am with jessica's two sisters, Alanis and Alivia:
went to Kat's saturday night, we watched Priscilla - i think the Abba turd really freaked her out. *8-) eeek, i can't believe that movie's TEN years old!!
then today it was back to Kat's - this time with mom...the two finally met, now they know they aren't each figments of my imagination. kat worked her stylist magic on my momma - here's the before/after pics to prove it:
mom's just thrilled - it took her long enough to finally take the plunge and get her hair colored...i'm glad she likes the results.
suppose i should get some sleep - off to the hand doc tomorrow!
saturday we went to my aunt sherry's house - to celebrate birthdays - my mom's, and my cousin's daughter's...jessica just turned 11 and went apeshit over anything and everything PINK...all her presents were either pink, a book, or Hillary Duff related!!!!!!! omigod!!!! there aren't enough exclamation points to adequately describe the excitement of preteen girls!!!!
the good thing about visiting aunt sherry - she's got all the grandbabies in the family...my branch of the family tree being a bit barren, we get to go over there and see my cousins and all their babies...then they get tired and cranky and we get to go home. *8-)
here i am with jessica's two sisters, Alanis and Alivia:
went to Kat's saturday night, we watched Priscilla - i think the Abba turd really freaked her out. *8-) eeek, i can't believe that movie's TEN years old!!
then today it was back to Kat's - this time with mom...the two finally met, now they know they aren't each figments of my imagination. kat worked her stylist magic on my momma - here's the before/after pics to prove it:
mom's just thrilled - it took her long enough to finally take the plunge and get her hair colored...i'm glad she likes the results.
suppose i should get some sleep - off to the hand doc tomorrow!
Saturday, May 15, 2004
not Bosnia - Croatia...
adam's gig this weekend isn't Bosnia - this time he's in Croatia...Opatija, to be specific...
Friday, May 14, 2004
clouds...
this afternoon, between various errands, i was struck by the beauty of a rainstorm. no, not struck by lightning or anything like that...
the sky was a very light shade of grey, with these big white fluffy clouds up high...below them, these dark charcoal colored wisps of clouds - the dark clouds were scurrying across the sky, as if they were rushing off to an appointment, or perhaps they were hiding from the rainstorm to come. soon, everything turned to gray and the rain began pounding onto my car, sheets of rain - drip drip drip...
amazing how something so simple can get stuck in your mind - the simple beauty of it all was just...hell, i don't even have the right word for it. it just was...
the sky was a very light shade of grey, with these big white fluffy clouds up high...below them, these dark charcoal colored wisps of clouds - the dark clouds were scurrying across the sky, as if they were rushing off to an appointment, or perhaps they were hiding from the rainstorm to come. soon, everything turned to gray and the rain began pounding onto my car, sheets of rain - drip drip drip...
amazing how something so simple can get stuck in your mind - the simple beauty of it all was just...hell, i don't even have the right word for it. it just was...
bumper stickers...
saw one on a truck the other day that left me flabbergasted and cracked me up at the same time...
MY OTHER RIDE
IS YOUR MOM
Thursday, May 13, 2004
VNS Update - it ain't brain surgery...
...so maybe i oughta just DO the brain surgery...
appointment with the neurologist today - upping the meds a bit, he doesn't wanna change the VNS settings - guess my coughing fit in the office the last time he tried really freaked him out...
in july, i'm meeting up with Dr. Vicenta Salanova to discuss a temporal lobectomy.
at first, the idea of brain surgery totally FREAKED me out. uh-uh, no how, no way. the VNS surgery wasn't nearly as scary - stick a battery in my chest, wrap a wire around a nerve in my neck. it ain't brain surgery, even tho it really was.
dr. mohan says the success rate for temporal lobectomy is 85-90% - i think those are really good odds, definitely worth looking into the option...willing to take the chance that things could get worse or not change in exchange for an 85-90% chance that my seizures will end? sounds like good odds to me...
the thing that scares the shit out of me? well, the part of the brain they're working with is around the language center, so if something does go wrong...eek, i don't wanna think about that. suffice it to say i'll need to get all my arrangements in order before the actual surgery were to happen.
dr. mohan says my diabetes makes me a less acceptable candidate because it may take longer to heal, but i've been doing really good at keeping my sugars in check and the endocrinologist was happy at my last visit...now i just need to get my stress, anxiety and depression in check - easy as pie! ;-)
appointment with the neurologist today - upping the meds a bit, he doesn't wanna change the VNS settings - guess my coughing fit in the office the last time he tried really freaked him out...
in july, i'm meeting up with Dr. Vicenta Salanova to discuss a temporal lobectomy.
at first, the idea of brain surgery totally FREAKED me out. uh-uh, no how, no way. the VNS surgery wasn't nearly as scary - stick a battery in my chest, wrap a wire around a nerve in my neck. it ain't brain surgery, even tho it really was.
dr. mohan says the success rate for temporal lobectomy is 85-90% - i think those are really good odds, definitely worth looking into the option...willing to take the chance that things could get worse or not change in exchange for an 85-90% chance that my seizures will end? sounds like good odds to me...
the thing that scares the shit out of me? well, the part of the brain they're working with is around the language center, so if something does go wrong...eek, i don't wanna think about that. suffice it to say i'll need to get all my arrangements in order before the actual surgery were to happen.
dr. mohan says my diabetes makes me a less acceptable candidate because it may take longer to heal, but i've been doing really good at keeping my sugars in check and the endocrinologist was happy at my last visit...now i just need to get my stress, anxiety and depression in check - easy as pie! ;-)
Wednesday, May 12, 2004
Tuesday, May 11, 2004
*woof woof*
deb's a dog. a bad dog - in a good way.
spose that's not the sort of compliment to give a chick that buys yer dinner, but you know you're a dog!
'scuse me while i go work on a little assignment. ;-)
spose that's not the sort of compliment to give a chick that buys yer dinner, but you know you're a dog!
'scuse me while i go work on a little assignment. ;-)
Monday, May 10, 2004
got rid of the winter coat...
yup, summer's definitely on it's way - shaved my legs today - woo hoo! *8-)
the fact that i don't keep the legs constantly shaved is NOT a political statement, or a requirement for my dykeness - guess i'm just a lazy ass. particularly in the wintertime.
smooth or hairy, don't matter to me...
but i did forget how good it feels to be hairless after several months' growth...*8-)
*rub rub rub*
the fact that i don't keep the legs constantly shaved is NOT a political statement, or a requirement for my dykeness - guess i'm just a lazy ass. particularly in the wintertime.
smooth or hairy, don't matter to me...
but i did forget how good it feels to be hairless after several months' growth...*8-)
*rub rub rub*
Sunday, May 09, 2004
men are assholes...
yeah, i think the title says it all - men are assholes...
inconsiderate self-centered obnoxious dickheads...
just my current opinion...ymmv.
inconsiderate self-centered obnoxious dickheads...
just my current opinion...ymmv.
Saturday, May 08, 2004
deb...
just can't say enough about this woman - she's so spiffy! *8-) (well, except for that abandoning us and leaving to go live in nashville part, but we won't talk about that)...
rather than sitting home on friday night waiting for the phone to ring, i went and met up with her to catch lisa's softball game...i miss going to the games - i'll hafta do that more often...
so tuesday @ 5:30, we're meeting for dinner at yats - haven't been there before, but i've heard it's good stuff...
rather than sitting home on friday night waiting for the phone to ring, i went and met up with her to catch lisa's softball game...i miss going to the games - i'll hafta do that more often...
so tuesday @ 5:30, we're meeting for dinner at yats - haven't been there before, but i've heard it's good stuff...
Friday, May 07, 2004
the more things change, the more they stay the same...
is that a quote from a specific person, or just some little ditty an anonymous person came up with to print on a t-shirt? hell if i know, but i'll be damned if it isn't the fucking truth.
the more things change, the more they stay the same...
unearthed my old journal today...it's one of the old-fashioned kind - made out of sheets of paper, they call them "books" - apparently that's what people used before blogs... ;-)
anyhoo, it's a blank book, with keith haring artwork on the cover...containing the gory details of my life spanning 3 nov 96 - 31 dec 99...and whaddaya know, a lot of the shit i wrote then is the same shit i'm dealing with now...depression, anxiety, job problems (granted, back then i actually HAD a job - now i'm freaking cuz i don't have one), and on and on and on...granted, there are things i'm dealing with now that i didn't deal with then (and vice versa) but it's amazing how similar things are...maybe it isn't amazing, maybe i'm just in a huge fucking RUT...
*shrug*
the more things change, the more they stay the same...
unearthed my old journal today...it's one of the old-fashioned kind - made out of sheets of paper, they call them "books" - apparently that's what people used before blogs... ;-)
anyhoo, it's a blank book, with keith haring artwork on the cover...containing the gory details of my life spanning 3 nov 96 - 31 dec 99...and whaddaya know, a lot of the shit i wrote then is the same shit i'm dealing with now...depression, anxiety, job problems (granted, back then i actually HAD a job - now i'm freaking cuz i don't have one), and on and on and on...granted, there are things i'm dealing with now that i didn't deal with then (and vice versa) but it's amazing how similar things are...maybe it isn't amazing, maybe i'm just in a huge fucking RUT...
*shrug*
googling people...
it's kinda weird when ya google a doc to get more info on their professional life and then ya find out personal stuff about them...for instance, apparently my new shrink is a pretty good ragtime piano player...
the new doc...
met the new shrink last night...trying to not get too excited, but my initial impression is very good - compared to the last 2 shrinks, he rocks!
i was worried initially because we seemed to get off on a rocky start - as we were going through my medical history, i told him that i had a Vagus Nerve Stimulator implanted and asked if he was familiar with it. it was then that he said "not everyone realizes this, but i am a medical doctor" - yeah buddy, i know a psychiatrist has an M.D. attached to his name. i apologized and told him that i did know that but that i've had to explain the VNS to many an M.D. and nurse in assorted ERs and doctor's offices. after that, things were cool.
i may be following in momma's footsteps with the sleep apnea thing - something i'll have to discuss with dr. mohan when i see him next week.
i was worried initially because we seemed to get off on a rocky start - as we were going through my medical history, i told him that i had a Vagus Nerve Stimulator implanted and asked if he was familiar with it. it was then that he said "not everyone realizes this, but i am a medical doctor" - yeah buddy, i know a psychiatrist has an M.D. attached to his name. i apologized and told him that i did know that but that i've had to explain the VNS to many an M.D. and nurse in assorted ERs and doctor's offices. after that, things were cool.
i may be following in momma's footsteps with the sleep apnea thing - something i'll have to discuss with dr. mohan when i see him next week.
Wednesday, May 05, 2004
getting a fix...
that's what i did this evening - fed my shopping addiction. today was the last day of Coupon Mania at Kroger - they double coupons up to $1.00 and triple the $0.50's. a great time to make purchases to send off to assorted food banks and charities around town.
cart full o groceries: $299.88
final price after zapping my evil plus card and taking off coupons: $111.34
total savings: $188.54
i put the cold stuff away, now i'm gonna take a nap and sort out the rest of the stuff later...*yawn* bargain hunting can be so exhausting.
cart full o groceries: $299.88
final price after zapping my evil plus card and taking off coupons: $111.34
total savings: $188.54
i put the cold stuff away, now i'm gonna take a nap and sort out the rest of the stuff later...*yawn* bargain hunting can be so exhausting.
my wrist...
went to physical therapy today...i guess the doc telling me monday that i might need either a cortisone shot or surgery scared my wrist - the pain has lessened a great deal...so now the physical therapist says we're gonna move on to strengthening exercises - excitement galore. hopefully the pain will be gone before a week from next monday and we won't need that cortisone shot - last time i had one it seemed to make things WORSE before they got better.
Tuesday, May 04, 2004
a hellcat - that's me!
heh heh heh - at least that's what deb called me when i told her of all my exciting plans for today - go vote, and do laundry. woo hoo - party animal, that's me!!
there's been some interesting discussion on the gayindy list about the election - some democrat voters are talking about crossing over and voting republican, either for Miller or Daniels, depending on their strategy. some think having miller in november's election will help Kernan (since miller's nuttier than a fruitcake - and NOT the good kind of fruitcake, either!), while some think having daniels in the election is a hell of a lot better than miller. i thought seriously about it before voting, but if there was any possible chance that my one vote would mean eric miller ended up as governor, i'd just have to blow my freaking brains out.
this appears to be the election of "who's the least evil?" - i wouldn't call joe kernan evil, but he said he wouldn't run for re-election, and whaddaya know, he's running. and we won't even get started on the presidential race....
there's been some interesting discussion on the gayindy list about the election - some democrat voters are talking about crossing over and voting republican, either for Miller or Daniels, depending on their strategy. some think having miller in november's election will help Kernan (since miller's nuttier than a fruitcake - and NOT the good kind of fruitcake, either!), while some think having daniels in the election is a hell of a lot better than miller. i thought seriously about it before voting, but if there was any possible chance that my one vote would mean eric miller ended up as governor, i'd just have to blow my freaking brains out.
this appears to be the election of "who's the least evil?" - i wouldn't call joe kernan evil, but he said he wouldn't run for re-election, and whaddaya know, he's running. and we won't even get started on the presidential race....
*twiddle twiddle twiddle*
insomnia sucks. hope the new doc gives me a good pill when i see him on thursday...
Monday, May 03, 2004
ugh...
ugh...
that one grunt pretty much says it all...
today started out all fine and dandy - left kat's this morning (we watched Pirates of the Caribbean last nite - johnny depp WAS robbed of that oscar!) and went to the hand doctor appointment, then went home. after seeing how nice the weather was today, i figured i'd go to the cemetery today, although it's actually Wednesday that's the tenth anniversary of Chris Gonzales' death. so i gave Kat a personalized tour of Crown Hill...then we headed to the Abbey for some food (yay! i got the last piece of mocha mousse cake!!)...then it was off to Out Word Bound...a rather amusing thing happened there, but i'm gonna hold off from talking about it right now...
it was while driving Kat home that my head started hurting...and this wave of emotions just crashed over me...
right now, i just feel like crap. i'll sit here and tell myself it's cuz it's that time of the month, but it's probably more than that...there's soooo much going on in my head and it's really overworking that one remaining semi-functional brain cell that i have...
that one grunt pretty much says it all...
today started out all fine and dandy - left kat's this morning (we watched Pirates of the Caribbean last nite - johnny depp WAS robbed of that oscar!) and went to the hand doctor appointment, then went home. after seeing how nice the weather was today, i figured i'd go to the cemetery today, although it's actually Wednesday that's the tenth anniversary of Chris Gonzales' death. so i gave Kat a personalized tour of Crown Hill...then we headed to the Abbey for some food (yay! i got the last piece of mocha mousse cake!!)...then it was off to Out Word Bound...a rather amusing thing happened there, but i'm gonna hold off from talking about it right now...
it was while driving Kat home that my head started hurting...and this wave of emotions just crashed over me...
right now, i just feel like crap. i'll sit here and tell myself it's cuz it's that time of the month, but it's probably more than that...there's soooo much going on in my head and it's really overworking that one remaining semi-functional brain cell that i have...
a ganglion cyst...
a ganglion cyst - that's what the hand surgeon thinks i may have now. we'll do a couple more weeks of physical therapy - if i'm still hurting in 2 weeks, we'll do a cortisone shot. if it still hurts after that, surgery may be necessary...dunno if i could get a 2fer and get the carpal tunnel stuff taken care of at the same time, guess we'll see if that time comes...
Thursday, April 29, 2004
movies...
kat and i have watched a few movies over the last couple of nights...i went over to her place wednesday night, and we rented Johnny English and Wonderland...we watched Johnny English - silly movie, but provided a much-needed laugh.
tonight, we watched Wonderland - interesting story, but a bit confusing...i guess that's the way with true-crime dramas nowadays - if there's the slightest bit of mystery they have to jumble everything up and change a few facts around to avoid libel charges or other potential lawsuits. Val Kilmer's an interesting John Holmes, and Dylan McDermott was practically unrecognizable - very weird. (somewhat related in the true-crime drama vein, June 1 is the release date for Monster on DVD - i'm looking forward to that one - yet another movie where it's definitely not got all the facts right, but if you take it as a fictional account, it's a damned good movie)
tonight, Kat treated me to a showing of Secretary - it was AWESOME...might just have to buy the DVD for myself. James Spader is just so fucking awesome, that's all there is to it. not very often that you find a movie about sadomasochism with such depth.
tonight, we watched Wonderland - interesting story, but a bit confusing...i guess that's the way with true-crime dramas nowadays - if there's the slightest bit of mystery they have to jumble everything up and change a few facts around to avoid libel charges or other potential lawsuits. Val Kilmer's an interesting John Holmes, and Dylan McDermott was practically unrecognizable - very weird. (somewhat related in the true-crime drama vein, June 1 is the release date for Monster on DVD - i'm looking forward to that one - yet another movie where it's definitely not got all the facts right, but if you take it as a fictional account, it's a damned good movie)
tonight, Kat treated me to a showing of Secretary - it was AWESOME...might just have to buy the DVD for myself. James Spader is just so fucking awesome, that's all there is to it. not very often that you find a movie about sadomasochism with such depth.
Wednesday, April 28, 2004
dinner last night...
while the brother's over in Bosnia, i went to La Hacienda with his girlfriend...never ate there when i lived in irvington, but codi says she and adam go there a lot, cuz it's cheap. not bad food, either.
so, i suppose if adam and codi don't ever get married, codi won't ever be a sister-in-law...would that make her a sister-outlaw instead? *8-)
so, i suppose if adam and codi don't ever get married, codi won't ever be a sister-in-law...would that make her a sister-outlaw instead? *8-)
Tuesday, April 27, 2004
Monday, April 26, 2004
tv critique...
okay, so we're now 2 episodes in to season 4 of Queer As Folk...first noticeable change is the intro - they've toned it down a bit...seems they've made it less queer...*shrug*...it's cool to see brian show some of his humanity while still keeping his amazing ability to be a huge asshole completely intact...the ted in rehab story irks me a bit - he's in therapy with an ex that he'd put into rehab that's now become a counselor?!?!? seems like a major ethical problem going on there - mitch shouldn't be his counselor or have anything to do with him other than to say he knows what he's going through and give him a little pat on the back. totally unrealistic story line there...*shrug*
and then there's the Restaurant - Rocco, yer fucking this one up. granted, it's making for great reality tv, but why get pissy when people call you on not ever being around when it's so obvious that you're never around, you're too busy plugging your book or whatever other little project you're working on...it'll be interesting to see how this one turns out...
meanwhile, on The Practice, there've been a number of interesting special guests (William Shatner's hysterical! Rebecca DeMornay's pretty good at the ice-queen bitch role, and it'll be interesting to see what they do with Vincent Pastore's (aka "Big Pussy" on the Sopranos) character. i wonder how many of these character's we'll be seeing in the spin-off that's supposed to be happening, with James Spader as the star...
Survivor All-Stars - c'mon Rupert, let's go all the way this time!!!
and then there's the Restaurant - Rocco, yer fucking this one up. granted, it's making for great reality tv, but why get pissy when people call you on not ever being around when it's so obvious that you're never around, you're too busy plugging your book or whatever other little project you're working on...it'll be interesting to see how this one turns out...
meanwhile, on The Practice, there've been a number of interesting special guests (William Shatner's hysterical! Rebecca DeMornay's pretty good at the ice-queen bitch role, and it'll be interesting to see what they do with Vincent Pastore's (aka "Big Pussy" on the Sopranos) character. i wonder how many of these character's we'll be seeing in the spin-off that's supposed to be happening, with James Spader as the star...
Survivor All-Stars - c'mon Rupert, let's go all the way this time!!!
shoulda listened...
ya know, when someone posts a link to TotalFark with the subject line "Not safe for epileptic nimpho's" (not my typo) you would think i'd know better than to click on the link...
alas, you are warned - this isn't safe for epileptic nymphos, or anyone else! but you know you wanna click it anyways...
alas, you are warned - this isn't safe for epileptic nymphos, or anyone else! but you know you wanna click it anyways...
heh heh heh...
"Voting is just like driving. If you want to go forward, put it in D. If you want to go back, put it in R"
pretty decent weekend...
had to cancel the AIDS memorial clean-up, because of all the rain last week and the forecasts saying we were gonna have crappy weather today (which didn't really seem to happen, of course!)...maybe next weekend - i dunno...
i didn't have time to actually participate in the "games" portion of games night saturday at steph's - i left at 8 to head over to michelle & deb's party. i'll have to find out if "scene it" is a good party game or not some other time, had to see deb since she won't be around much longer - the danged traitor is leaving for that evil city of Nashville, TN...*8-P
Zima's got a new flavor - XXX Hard Black Cherry Zima. Took a 6 pack to Michelle's - 'twas very good, i'll definitely get it again...
i didn't have time to actually participate in the "games" portion of games night saturday at steph's - i left at 8 to head over to michelle & deb's party. i'll have to find out if "scene it" is a good party game or not some other time, had to see deb since she won't be around much longer - the danged traitor is leaving for that evil city of Nashville, TN...*8-P
Zima's got a new flavor - XXX Hard Black Cherry Zima. Took a 6 pack to Michelle's - 'twas very good, i'll definitely get it again...
Sunday, April 25, 2004
Friday, April 23, 2004
Designs On The White House...
this could be interesting - the Designs On The White House contest will pick shirts to be printed and sold for eight different categories:
1. Best Pro-Kerry Shirt (positive spin, no mention of Bush)
2. Best Anti-Bush Shirt (negative spin, must mention Bush)
3. Best Issue Shirt - Domestic
4. Best Issue Shirt - Foreign
5. Funniest Shirt
6. Best Retro Shirt
7. Best Get Out The Vote Shirt
8. Most stylish / Most likely to be featured on Queer Eye
regardless of whether or not i become inspired to design a shirt, i'll hafta go back and check out the winners...
1. Best Pro-Kerry Shirt (positive spin, no mention of Bush)
2. Best Anti-Bush Shirt (negative spin, must mention Bush)
3. Best Issue Shirt - Domestic
4. Best Issue Shirt - Foreign
5. Funniest Shirt
6. Best Retro Shirt
7. Best Get Out The Vote Shirt
8. Most stylish / Most likely to be featured on Queer Eye
regardless of whether or not i become inspired to design a shirt, i'll hafta go back and check out the winners...
Thursday, April 22, 2004
games...
so saturday's a special edition of Girl's Games Night - rather than the usual friday night affair at Out Word Bound or Vic's, it'll be at Steph's house...
a couple of months ago i got a card in the mail - test drive a mitsubishi, get a CD of music from their commercials and a $25 American Express card. finally got the $ in the mail yesterday. that, combined with a $10 gift card from Target for getting a prescription filled, meant i got a new game for FREE. *8-)
so, i purchased Scene It? - a movie trivia game. taking it to Steph's should be good, since she'll have a DVD player, something that we might not have access to at a regular games night...
a couple of months ago i got a card in the mail - test drive a mitsubishi, get a CD of music from their commercials and a $25 American Express card. finally got the $ in the mail yesterday. that, combined with a $10 gift card from Target for getting a prescription filled, meant i got a new game for FREE. *8-)
so, i purchased Scene It? - a movie trivia game. taking it to Steph's should be good, since she'll have a DVD player, something that we might not have access to at a regular games night...
queer as folk...
the new season started up this weekend - i taped the first episode, because i wanted to watch season 3 over again since i have it on dvd. for some reason, i thought i'd missed some episodes, but now i don't think i did. i think i just WISHED i'd missed some of 'em. the whole ted on drugs thing hits pretty damned close to home - i hadn't noticed my similarities to emmett previously, going from being blissfully ignorant to just totally enabling the drug use and lies and thefts...pretty weird how my situation with kris was years ago and it still affects me the way it does - well, perhaps it's NOT so weird, but i guess i just wish it didn't affect me the way it has. it'd be nice to go back to that blissfully ignorant phase, where i could trust and depend on people.
Wednesday, April 21, 2004
summoning the weather spirits...
alright now, it's becoming obvious i shoulda scheduled the AIDS memorial cleanup for LAST weekend - we had such beyootiful weather, now it's just rainy and soggy and i dunno if we'll be meeting up on sunday or not...
physical therapy...
did the physical therapy thang today for my wrist...so now i've got a list of exercises to do 2 or 3 times a day - can't quite do them all yet, it's still too painful. argh...too bad that physical therapist only massaged my hand and wrist - i think a full body massage might be rather useful nowadays....
Monday, April 19, 2004
wasting the days away...
sheesh, it's a good thing i didn't have a job to go to today, otherwise i woulda really been screwed. went to dr. tumuluri's office since my hand is STILL hurting after falling on it last tuesday. then i had to run around to several different places, getting an x-ray and such. my appointment was at 1 o'clock - i finally got home at 5:30....grrr! alas, there were no fractures visible on the x-ray, so i have a new splint and appointments for physical therapy and i go back to the doc in a couple of weeks. fun fun fun.
a new 'do...
Kat made me her guinea pig and i now have a new hairdo - i'd told her that no matter how she asked, i would NOT shake my butt like Ray the Blockbuster guinea pig, but who knows, maybe now i will....*8-)
Saturday, April 17, 2004
slowly recooperating...
taking longer than usual to recover from that last seizure, i think - my mind's just blank. don't have the words for what's going on - a sign that things are getting more fucked up in the temporal lobe? not sure. the endocrinologist wants me to take lots o notes on how my blood sugars are doing, and we're making a few changes to the meds, so hopefully that will help things a bit. the last thing i need is seizures while i'm sleeping because my blood sugar drops too low...
Thursday, April 15, 2004
Tuesday, April 13, 2004
VNS Update...
Dr. Mohan mentioned the S word today - SURGERY. since the VNS isn't controlling my seizures as much as we'd like it to, perhaps i need to be thinking about it. eh, i'm not using all my brain anyways, let's just carve out the malfunctioning parts. hopefully there'll be some left over!
before today's appointment, the VNS was set at 1.25, with the magnet zapping it up to 1.5 - today, when doc tried upping it to 1.5 / 1.75, it was clear that i couldn't take the boost - i started choking, tears streaming down my face. kinda weird, i haven't had such a strong reaction to this before. so, he backed it down to 1.5, with the magnet also zapping it at 1.5 - generally it's standard to set the magnet activation at .25 higher than the ongoing setting, but we'll see how this goes for now...
he's also wondering if the seizures i'm having could be related to low blood sugars, so i'm going to have to chat with the endocrinologist about some potential changes to those meds...fun fun fun!!!!
before today's appointment, the VNS was set at 1.25, with the magnet zapping it up to 1.5 - today, when doc tried upping it to 1.5 / 1.75, it was clear that i couldn't take the boost - i started choking, tears streaming down my face. kinda weird, i haven't had such a strong reaction to this before. so, he backed it down to 1.5, with the magnet also zapping it at 1.5 - generally it's standard to set the magnet activation at .25 higher than the ongoing setting, but we'll see how this goes for now...
he's also wondering if the seizures i'm having could be related to low blood sugars, so i'm going to have to chat with the endocrinologist about some potential changes to those meds...fun fun fun!!!!
Sunday, April 11, 2004
VNS Update...
time to schedule another appointment with the neurologist - had a seizure early this morning. as far as i can tell, i missed one dose of meds - definitely not enough to warrant having a seizure. dunno if dr. mohan will wanna take me off the lamictal and try something else, or just up the VNS stimulation...
Saturday, April 10, 2004
a phrase that irks me....
"just friends" - as in, "let's just be friends" ...
hey, having a good healthy friendship is a good thing, and to add a "just" to it seems to cheapen it. yeah, okay, an intense physical/sexual/emotional/spiritual/ relationship might not be around the bend, but having a great friend is a damned good thing to have...
perhaps it's that "just friends" thing that scares me from telling people when i have an interest...kat eked it out of me, but generally a lot of crushes i've had have been completely ignored or shuttered to the back of my brain, because i'm scared of that "let's just be friends" comment, which generally means "ooh, you're interested in me, i don't feel that way about you, so now let's just let the cool friendship we had die a slow and painful death"...and i told kat that i felt that way, that if she wasn't into a relationship idea that i didn't want her thinking i had any ulterior motives and i didn't want it to affect our future as friends. those "just friends"...
hey, having a good healthy friendship is a good thing, and to add a "just" to it seems to cheapen it. yeah, okay, an intense physical/sexual/emotional/spiritual/
perhaps it's that "just friends" thing that scares me from telling people when i have an interest...kat eked it out of me, but generally a lot of crushes i've had have been completely ignored or shuttered to the back of my brain, because i'm scared of that "let's just be friends" comment, which generally means "ooh, you're interested in me, i don't feel that way about you, so now let's just let the cool friendship we had die a slow and painful death"...and i told kat that i felt that way, that if she wasn't into a relationship idea that i didn't want her thinking i had any ulterior motives and i didn't want it to affect our future as friends. those "just friends"...
Friday, April 09, 2004
Kat's outta the bag...
...so to speak...i told kat about my crush on her. i think we'll have to talk more about it later (we had to go pick up her son) but at least it's out in the open now, and she didn't puke her guts out and flee from the car when i told her, so that's a good sign - right? right?
Thursday, April 08, 2004
the Indiana AIDS Memorial @ Crown Hill Cemetery
definitely in need of some spring cleaning - Crown Hill does an okay job of keeping the branches picked up and the grass mowed, but c'mon now - we need to make this baby look FABULOUS!
Social Attachments
so, i was driving through Crown Hill cemetery yesterday, and took a different route than usual. a sculpture that's on display there caught my eye, so i got out and took a look at it. pix don't do it justice, but here's one anyhoo:
i was taken aback when i read the artist's commentary - on a stand next to the sculpture, it reads:
Social Attachments
My intention with Social Attachments was to illustrate different relationships. Some are solid; some are passive; others are tenuous at best.
Michael B. Wilken $8,700
ya know, i don't think i drove past that sculpture - i think something out there drove me to it. just looking at it was cool, then reading about relationships and knowing how i'm dealing with that sort of stuff in my life right now just really freaked me out a bit...
solid...passive...tenuous...
i was taken aback when i read the artist's commentary - on a stand next to the sculpture, it reads:
Social Attachments
My intention with Social Attachments was to illustrate different relationships. Some are solid; some are passive; others are tenuous at best.
Michael B. Wilken $8,700
ya know, i don't think i drove past that sculpture - i think something out there drove me to it. just looking at it was cool, then reading about relationships and knowing how i'm dealing with that sort of stuff in my life right now just really freaked me out a bit...
solid...passive...tenuous...
Wednesday, April 07, 2004
hrmmm, perhaps i should get my brother this t-shirt...
the American Traveler International Apology Shirt says "I'm sorry my president's an idiot. I didn't vote for him." (in the six official UN languages) - what with adam doing gigs in Bosnia, Serbia and Croatia this month, it may come in handy...let's just all work to make sure that it'll be obsolete come election time...
Tuesday, April 06, 2004
go alanis!
apparently the statement's beyond comprehension of most farkers, but i think alanis morrissette's bit at the Junos was rather amusing...
Hosting the 2004 Juno Awards ceremonies, Canada's version of the Grammies, Morissette disrobed on stage to reveal a skin-colored, naked body suit with nipples and pubic hair.
As part of the skit, Morissette was then told by the show's assistant-director that "actually, we can't show nipples or pubic hair on national TV," at which time the Ottawa-born singer pulled off the fake body parts.
The satirical act, says Morissette, was aimed at U.S. government institutions for over-reacting to cultural, free expression, as a result of the fallout surrounding Janet Jackson's Super Bowl faux pas, when her breast was accidentally exposed to millions of television viewers.
fuck yeah, the Puritanical bullshit that's taken over the US is more than deserving of parody!
Hosting the 2004 Juno Awards ceremonies, Canada's version of the Grammies, Morissette disrobed on stage to reveal a skin-colored, naked body suit with nipples and pubic hair.
As part of the skit, Morissette was then told by the show's assistant-director that "actually, we can't show nipples or pubic hair on national TV," at which time the Ottawa-born singer pulled off the fake body parts.
The satirical act, says Morissette, was aimed at U.S. government institutions for over-reacting to cultural, free expression, as a result of the fallout surrounding Janet Jackson's Super Bowl faux pas, when her breast was accidentally exposed to millions of television viewers.
fuck yeah, the Puritanical bullshit that's taken over the US is more than deserving of parody!
Sunday, April 04, 2004
babies babies babies...
being the old maid of the family, i've left mom without grandchildren...i suppose adam could still provide an extended branch o' the family tree, but it ain't happening with me. (it's cute to hear him or codi make some sort of comment about "well, if we have kids..." but if ya mention marriage or kids to 'em, it's just not a subject for discussion...)
however, we do manage to get our fill of babies by visiting my aunt sherry - her daughter marian's got four kids and sherry's stepchildren have provided several other grandbabies in the family...
saturday we got together for marian's daughter alanis' 3rd birthday. we went to Build A Bear to create various stuffed animals (no, i didn't get one, although i did get a pair of sunglasses for Puffy, the pig that my brother gave me for Xmas) then we went back to sherry's to do what the whole family knows how to do: eat.
anyhoo, here's a pic of me with alivia, marian's most recent addition to the family:
see the big yellow blob on my ear? i had sticker earrings put on me by alanis, and forgot they were still stuck to me....
however, we do manage to get our fill of babies by visiting my aunt sherry - her daughter marian's got four kids and sherry's stepchildren have provided several other grandbabies in the family...
saturday we got together for marian's daughter alanis' 3rd birthday. we went to Build A Bear to create various stuffed animals (no, i didn't get one, although i did get a pair of sunglasses for Puffy, the pig that my brother gave me for Xmas) then we went back to sherry's to do what the whole family knows how to do: eat.
anyhoo, here's a pic of me with alivia, marian's most recent addition to the family:
see the big yellow blob on my ear? i had sticker earrings put on me by alanis, and forgot they were still stuck to me....
DST
all you never really wanted to know about Daylight Saving Time...
ya know, i suppose it's cuz i'm a born and bred Hoosier, but i just don't get the whole DST thing. and every fricking year we have to have a big discussion about it at the statehouse, only to do nothing about it - hell, it's even the cover story on this month's Indianapolis Monthly. seems like we've turned into such a 24-7 society that it really doesn't matter all that much, we should just all be consistent...
ya know, i suppose it's cuz i'm a born and bred Hoosier, but i just don't get the whole DST thing. and every fricking year we have to have a big discussion about it at the statehouse, only to do nothing about it - hell, it's even the cover story on this month's Indianapolis Monthly. seems like we've turned into such a 24-7 society that it really doesn't matter all that much, we should just all be consistent...
Saturday, April 03, 2004
not too talkative...
i know, i know, i haven't been too talkative lately - my mind's a blank slate these days. i'm trying my damnedest to get outta this funk, but i seem to have dug myself a pretty deep hole...
so, let's just compile a list of what's on lori's list of things to do...
baking: gotta make some desserts for Alanis's birthday - 3 years old! m&m brownies, a jello mold, and....i dunno what else...
reading: The Book on Bush: How George W. (Mis)leads America by Eric Alterman and Mark J. Green - just picked it up from the library today.
watching: queued up in the DVD player is Secrets & Lies - had to get it from Brazil since it's not been released in the US. such a cool fucking movie - i'm not quite sure what the attraction is in it for me, but i just think it's brilliant. i also need to get the 3rd season of Queer As Folk watched on DVD before season 4 starts up in a couple of weeks.
and right now, sleeping...
so, let's just compile a list of what's on lori's list of things to do...
baking: gotta make some desserts for Alanis's birthday - 3 years old! m&m brownies, a jello mold, and....i dunno what else...
reading: The Book on Bush: How George W. (Mis)leads America by Eric Alterman and Mark J. Green - just picked it up from the library today.
watching: queued up in the DVD player is Secrets & Lies - had to get it from Brazil since it's not been released in the US. such a cool fucking movie - i'm not quite sure what the attraction is in it for me, but i just think it's brilliant. i also need to get the 3rd season of Queer As Folk watched on DVD before season 4 starts up in a couple of weeks.
and right now, sleeping...
Tuesday, March 30, 2004
today's fortune...
"You are what you eat" - hmmmm...
ya know, i could make all sorts of comments about that, but i think i'll refrain at this point...
ya know, i could make all sorts of comments about that, but i think i'll refrain at this point...
Monday, March 29, 2004
weekend update...
had a surprisingly okay weekend - i wasn't sure when friday started off rather crappily. then i went to group therapy and had a breakdown and all was better for that evening...
friday night was games night @ Vic's. deb broke my heart and didn't show up, but oh well. *whimper* i'll get over it eventually. ;-)
saturday was uneventful, did some shopping and stuff. sunday mom and i went to the paul gilmartin show at crackers. he was funny as hell. definitely hafta do that again sometime...
spent today working on some projects mom's roped me into doing for a few of her friends. i suppose it's all for the best - make a little extra cash and all, but my creative juices seem to have just dried up during the unemployment thang. she likes the stuff i'm giving her, but i think it's crap. *shrug*
friday night was games night @ Vic's. deb broke my heart and didn't show up, but oh well. *whimper* i'll get over it eventually. ;-)
saturday was uneventful, did some shopping and stuff. sunday mom and i went to the paul gilmartin show at crackers. he was funny as hell. definitely hafta do that again sometime...
spent today working on some projects mom's roped me into doing for a few of her friends. i suppose it's all for the best - make a little extra cash and all, but my creative juices seem to have just dried up during the unemployment thang. she likes the stuff i'm giving her, but i think it's crap. *shrug*
Thursday, March 25, 2004
great promo idea...mark yer calendars for Monday May 10th!
dunno how much it'll end up costing Long John Silvers, but i think their latest promo's a hoot:
LOUISVILLE, KY, March 24, 2004 - NASA's March 23 announcement of evidence of the past presence of "a body of gently flowing saltwater" on Mars is big news for America, and giant news for seafood fans.
In January, Long John Silver's offered to give America free Giant Shrimp if NASA found conclusive evidence of an ocean on Mars. To celebrate the success of NASA's Mars Rover project, the company is going to give America free Giant Shrimp on Monday, May 10.
read the whole press release, it's rather amusing...
LOUISVILLE, KY, March 24, 2004 - NASA's March 23 announcement of evidence of the past presence of "a body of gently flowing saltwater" on Mars is big news for America, and giant news for seafood fans.
In January, Long John Silver's offered to give America free Giant Shrimp if NASA found conclusive evidence of an ocean on Mars. To celebrate the success of NASA's Mars Rover project, the company is going to give America free Giant Shrimp on Monday, May 10.
read the whole press release, it's rather amusing...
sunday night's plans...
Paul Gilmartin's doing his schtick at Crackers Comedy Club in Broad Ripple - this should be mega-cool!
Wednesday, March 24, 2004
Roeper, for this one, i'll give ya Two Thumbs Up!
although Roger Ebert stomps his ass as far as movie reviewing goes, i must give props to Richard Roeper for his article regarding the FCC...
Tuesday, March 23, 2004
Monday, March 22, 2004
damn, whodathunk a discussion of anti-depressants could be so depressing?
this thread on fark about anti-depressants makes it very clear just how many Farkers there are out there on drugs - which i suppose should be obvious, considering most of the comments on the site, but still...didn't know so many of us were clinically depressed.
*8-(
*8-(
Sunday, March 21, 2004
the Grapple update...
so, we tried the Grapples.
thoroughly unimpressed - good fuji apples, with an odor of the fake grape flavoring used in candies and such. didn't really seem to affect the taste of the apples. way overpriced, at 4 for $2.99.
thoroughly unimpressed - good fuji apples, with an odor of the fake grape flavoring used in candies and such. didn't really seem to affect the taste of the apples. way overpriced, at 4 for $2.99.
growing up dykey...
so, this discussion on fark brought back a long-forgotten memory - my crush on Moose from You Can't Do That On Television...i was probably nine or ten years old, and i thought she was the coolest, cutest thing - i wanted to kiss her. and homosexuality's supposedly a learned behavior?!!? don't think so!
come to think of it, another early crush i had was on a swimming instructor i had at the YMCA summer day camp - Froggie.
hmmm, what's it say that i found myself attracted to women with animal nicknames?!?
come to think of it, another early crush i had was on a swimming instructor i had at the YMCA summer day camp - Froggie.
hmmm, what's it say that i found myself attracted to women with animal nicknames?!?
Saturday, March 20, 2004
major brain fart...
crap. argh. damn. FUCK!!
forgot to get up this morning and get Jimmy Buffett tix - figured if Clara can't come to see 'im, i'd at least make some $$ selling em off. then i forgot to do it. argh!
forgot to get up this morning and get Jimmy Buffett tix - figured if Clara can't come to see 'im, i'd at least make some $$ selling em off. then i forgot to do it. argh!
saturday shopping trip...
went to the outlet mall with mom today, after finding out that Borders has opened an outlet down there - it was a bust. oh well.
went to the Big Dogs store - that was a bust as well. They must have a new design team or something, but their sense of humor/attitude has changed, and it's definitely not for the better. i suppose i sound like a prude saying that the new stuff they put out is too risque, but hell, it'd probably violate a workplace casual dress code because it's all so sexually suggestive - it's cool to have stuff like that once in a while, but it seems as though their whole line is moving in that direction. oh well, it's their loss - i was a pretty regular customer for quite a few years.
went to the Big Dogs store - that was a bust as well. They must have a new design team or something, but their sense of humor/attitude has changed, and it's definitely not for the better. i suppose i sound like a prude saying that the new stuff they put out is too risque, but hell, it'd probably violate a workplace casual dress code because it's all so sexually suggestive - it's cool to have stuff like that once in a while, but it seems as though their whole line is moving in that direction. oh well, it's their loss - i was a pretty regular customer for quite a few years.
spiffy...
EarthCam's MetroCam Network has webcams from around the world - how appropriate, considering all the fat people in our city, that Indianapolis features a Rhinocam and Elephantcam.
Friday, March 19, 2004
Thursday, March 18, 2004
evil omarosa...
Omarosa Manigault-Stallworth from The Apprentice says that Ereka Vetrini had called her the "n-word." Ummm, sorry dear, but if you say that someone using the cliche "If that's not the pot calling the kettle black" is being racist, i dunno how much weight your cries of racism are gonna carry.
not that you asked, but my money's on Troy to take it all the way to becoming the Apprentice...
not that you asked, but my money's on Troy to take it all the way to becoming the Apprentice...
Folding@Home
adam says i should sign up to join in on this Folding@Home thang, but i haven't read all the details yet...
Rhea County Tennessee seeks to outlaw homosexuals...
choose your bias - read the article from the advocate or fox news channel - basically, they wanna make a local law that would ban gays and lesbians from living in Rhea County.
perhaps michael moore should get the sodomobile fired up and take a trip down to tennessee - i think that'd be great, to just FLOOD them with queers and monkeys, what with the place being known for its part in the scopes monkey trial...
perhaps michael moore should get the sodomobile fired up and take a trip down to tennessee - i think that'd be great, to just FLOOD them with queers and monkeys, what with the place being known for its part in the scopes monkey trial...
Wednesday, March 17, 2004
VNS Update...happy anniversary!
one year ago today, i was up at St. Vincent's Hospital. Neurosurgeon Ronald Young cut me open and stuck the Vagus Nerve Stimulator in me. the rest is history... *8-)
weird - transgendered fruits...
hahahaha, no i'm not referring to friends o mine. ;-)
went to the store today and found a package of Grapples (pronounced "Grape-L") - an apple that tastes like grapes. alrighty then. haven't tried it yet, gonna wait and see mom's reaction.
went to the store today and found a package of Grapples (pronounced "Grape-L") - an apple that tastes like grapes. alrighty then. haven't tried it yet, gonna wait and see mom's reaction.
Monday, March 15, 2004
Going to the Courthouse
i suppose she didn't send it out to mutualfriends.org's mailing list because it's a non-political group, but Michele O'Mara's planning a demonstration next Monday - Going to the Courthouse - there's even an article about it in the Indy Star.
Friday, March 12, 2004
VNS Update...
another appointment with no change to the VNS - at my last appointment, Dr. Mohan prescribed Trileptal - after reading the patient info, i contacted him and we agreed that perhaps it wasn't the best idea for me, so instead of Trileptal, i'm taking Lamictal - started with taking one 25 mg pill a day, then upped it to two pills a day. no seizures thus far, but we'll see how it goes - still too early to tell if it's the drug working or if i'm just in a no-seizure period.
i really need to get to work on my VNS website - i've had this damned thing in me for close to a year now...
i really need to get to work on my VNS website - i've had this damned thing in me for close to a year now...
Thursday, March 11, 2004
the D Word...
oh shit, what to do what to do what to do??
my brother's birthday's tomorrow, he turns the big 23. we're getting together and going to the ex-stepmonster's house to pick up our brother & sister and then going out to celebrate.
so, anyhoo, i'm online talking to adam (brother) and he mentions that he gets an instant message from our half-sister (paige) about friday night. so adam tells me paige's screenname and i send her a message:
LBthePDD: :-P yo sis, how's it goin?
PurdueSoccer91: good
PurdueSoccer91: is this lori?
LBthePDD: NO, it's your other sister. :-P
LBthePDD: yes, it's lori!
PurdueSoccer91: lol
PurdueSoccer91: well my friend megan calls me a sis
LBthePDD: ahhhhhh
and so on and so forth...
then it occurs to me - paige doesn't know what LBthePDD stands for: Lori Beth, the Pillsbury Dough DYKE.
she's 12 years old - time to tell her? (if she's not already figured it out) it's not a matter of my being closeted - i don't change my behavior around matt & paige. *shrug* just seems awkward.
my brother's birthday's tomorrow, he turns the big 23. we're getting together and going to the ex-stepmonster's house to pick up our brother & sister and then going out to celebrate.
so, anyhoo, i'm online talking to adam (brother) and he mentions that he gets an instant message from our half-sister (paige) about friday night. so adam tells me paige's screenname and i send her a message:
LBthePDD: :-P yo sis, how's it goin?
PurdueSoccer91: good
PurdueSoccer91: is this lori?
LBthePDD: NO, it's your other sister. :-P
LBthePDD: yes, it's lori!
PurdueSoccer91: lol
PurdueSoccer91: well my friend megan calls me a sis
LBthePDD: ahhhhhh
and so on and so forth...
then it occurs to me - paige doesn't know what LBthePDD stands for: Lori Beth, the Pillsbury Dough DYKE.
she's 12 years old - time to tell her? (if she's not already figured it out) it's not a matter of my being closeted - i don't change my behavior around matt & paige. *shrug* just seems awkward.
Monday, March 08, 2004
the L Word...
so, i caught the first 3 (or was it 4?) episodes of The L Word when i was at michelle's house saturday night...'twas fun watching with Deb, her smart-ass comments were very similar to ones rolling around in my head...
while most of what was on the show didn't really relate to me, one thing that's had me thinking was Alice's whole thing about mapping out the lesbo scene with a 6 degrees of separation/kevin bacon sort of thing...
hell, forget the "lived with", "had a relationship with" stuff - just mapping out dykes in indy that have had sex with each other would be WAAAAAAAAAAAAY too freaky, i think. the thought of having sex with someone who's had sex with someone that had sex with someone i consider a friend - i dunno if my brain could handle it. well...i guess it would depend on the people involved - i know that i have had sex with a woman that had just broken up with a friend o mine, but that was just a one night stand sort of thang. still, as small as the queer community is in this town, i think it'd be waaaay too incestuous - prepare to be squicked by just pondering it for a few minutes...
while most of what was on the show didn't really relate to me, one thing that's had me thinking was Alice's whole thing about mapping out the lesbo scene with a 6 degrees of separation/kevin bacon sort of thing...
hell, forget the "lived with", "had a relationship with" stuff - just mapping out dykes in indy that have had sex with each other would be WAAAAAAAAAAAAY too freaky, i think. the thought of having sex with someone who's had sex with someone that had sex with someone i consider a friend - i dunno if my brain could handle it. well...i guess it would depend on the people involved - i know that i have had sex with a woman that had just broken up with a friend o mine, but that was just a one night stand sort of thang. still, as small as the queer community is in this town, i think it'd be waaaay too incestuous - prepare to be squicked by just pondering it for a few minutes...
Sunday, March 07, 2004
open secrets are interesting to read...
opensecrets.org is an interesting website - you can search by ZIP code to see how much money people are donating to political causes...i suppose this is a way to find out the political leanings of various businesses or personalities around town...
for instance:
Indiana Pacers Coach Rick Carlisle made two donations of $1,000 each to the campaign of John Edwards...
The president of Noble Roman's Pizza made a $1,000 donation to the National Republican Congressional Committee...
Marla Stevens from LGBT Fairness Indiana made a $2,000 donation to Dennis Kucinich's campaign last July...
Greg Dixon (no middle initial there, so i dunno if it's the father or son) from the Indianapolis Baptist Temple gave $250 to the Libertarian National Committee...
Former Governor Bob Orr gave Dick Lugar $1,000 and Dubya $2,000...
Jim Irsay (owner of the Indianapolis Colts) has lots of cash to dole out: $1,000 to Dan Burton, $2,000 to Dick Lugar, $500 to Julia Carson, $2,000 to John Edwards, $1,000 to Evan Bayh, another $1,000 to Evan Bayh, and $2,000 to George W. Bush - interesting, the Bush contribution was on 9/5/2003, the Edwards contribution on 1/13/2004 - what'd ol' Dubya do to piss Irsay off?
NASCAR driver Tony Stewart sent $2,000 to the campaign of Kevin Triplett, a dude from Virginia running for congress...
for instance:
Indiana Pacers Coach Rick Carlisle made two donations of $1,000 each to the campaign of John Edwards...
The president of Noble Roman's Pizza made a $1,000 donation to the National Republican Congressional Committee...
Marla Stevens from LGBT Fairness Indiana made a $2,000 donation to Dennis Kucinich's campaign last July...
Greg Dixon (no middle initial there, so i dunno if it's the father or son) from the Indianapolis Baptist Temple gave $250 to the Libertarian National Committee...
Former Governor Bob Orr gave Dick Lugar $1,000 and Dubya $2,000...
Jim Irsay (owner of the Indianapolis Colts) has lots of cash to dole out: $1,000 to Dan Burton, $2,000 to Dick Lugar, $500 to Julia Carson, $2,000 to John Edwards, $1,000 to Evan Bayh, another $1,000 to Evan Bayh, and $2,000 to George W. Bush - interesting, the Bush contribution was on 9/5/2003, the Edwards contribution on 1/13/2004 - what'd ol' Dubya do to piss Irsay off?
NASCAR driver Tony Stewart sent $2,000 to the campaign of Kevin Triplett, a dude from Virginia running for congress...
Saturday, March 06, 2004
a semblance of a life...*gasp*
oh my, i actually went out and DID SOCIAL THINGS on saturday...
went to steph's to play games - we played a couple different versions of Mystery Rummy - very cool. crossing my fingers that she actually implements her idea of another games night - the once a month lesbo games night on friday just doesn't totally fulfill my desire to hang out with spiffy people and play board games....
later in the evening, it was off to Michelle's, to watch the L Word - she invited a bunch o lesbos over to see the L Word marathon that she had on tape. i've been recording them all on my PC, but realized that the DVD players around the house won't play DVD-R's, so i need to buy a more modern DVD player before i can watch stuff that i burn onto DVD-R's. as for the show...it's interesting, i suppose. doesn't hold a candle to Queer As Folk, but it's got some good lines and that lesbian visibility thing is always good - maybe the straight people will learn a thing or two...*shrug*
hafta post more later...
went to steph's to play games - we played a couple different versions of Mystery Rummy - very cool. crossing my fingers that she actually implements her idea of another games night - the once a month lesbo games night on friday just doesn't totally fulfill my desire to hang out with spiffy people and play board games....
later in the evening, it was off to Michelle's, to watch the L Word - she invited a bunch o lesbos over to see the L Word marathon that she had on tape. i've been recording them all on my PC, but realized that the DVD players around the house won't play DVD-R's, so i need to buy a more modern DVD player before i can watch stuff that i burn onto DVD-R's. as for the show...it's interesting, i suppose. doesn't hold a candle to Queer As Folk, but it's got some good lines and that lesbian visibility thing is always good - maybe the straight people will learn a thing or two...*shrug*
hafta post more later...
Thursday, March 04, 2004
Ian McKellan, quoting Thomas Jefferson on Bill Maher's show
saw a rerun tonight of the Feb 27 episode of Real Time With Bill Maher - Ian McKellan was on and discussion of gay marriage was a major topic...McKellan mentioned a quote from Thomas Jefferson that i think bears repeating (even though, as Maher pointed out, Jefferson was bangin' his slaves)...
"Laws and institutions must go hand in hand with the progress of the human mind. As that becomes more developed, more enlightened, as manners and opinions change, institutions must advance also to keep pace with the times. We might as well require a man to wear still the coat which fitted him when a boy as civilized society to remain ever under the regimen of their barbarous ancestors."
now, i've heard it mentioned in several places about all the benefits that married people have because of marriage - literally THOUSANDS of benefits. perhaps it's because i've never been married myself, but i can't see that - thousands?? what are these benefits? i know that being able to add a spouse to your insurance and appoint them as the person to decide whether to end your life support are such benefits, but what else?
regardless of what these benefits are, and the fact that i don't know what they are, i do know one thing: married people don't deserve them. seems to me that the government is giving preferential treatment to people that get married, and i don't think that's right - marriage is a religious/spiritual union, and should be treated as such - it has no place in our government.
another topic frequently discussed: the Equal Protection Clause of the 14th amendment of the U.S. Constitution - shouldn't that trump any sort of amendment banning gay marriage? or shouldn't it just mean that marriage shouldn't have anything to do with the Constitution, and if a married person has the right to put their spouse in charge of medical decisions, then an unmarried person should have the same right to name a person in a similar situation?
i guess the more that i think about it, the more i find myself annoyed with the whole gay marriage thing - it seems as though we're selling ourselves short in asking for the same rights as heterosexual married couples. instead of saying "hey, i'm gay and my girlfriend and i want to get married so we have the same rights as you hetero married people" shouldn't we be saying "everybody deserves the same rights and treatments by the government, regardless of their marital status"?
*shrug* it sucks that this is brought up in an election year to divide the country and try to make us forget that Dubya has totally fucked up this country in so many ways. let's discuss it when everything isn't so fucked up and people can be a bit more rational and level-headed.
"Laws and institutions must go hand in hand with the progress of the human mind. As that becomes more developed, more enlightened, as manners and opinions change, institutions must advance also to keep pace with the times. We might as well require a man to wear still the coat which fitted him when a boy as civilized society to remain ever under the regimen of their barbarous ancestors."
now, i've heard it mentioned in several places about all the benefits that married people have because of marriage - literally THOUSANDS of benefits. perhaps it's because i've never been married myself, but i can't see that - thousands?? what are these benefits? i know that being able to add a spouse to your insurance and appoint them as the person to decide whether to end your life support are such benefits, but what else?
regardless of what these benefits are, and the fact that i don't know what they are, i do know one thing: married people don't deserve them. seems to me that the government is giving preferential treatment to people that get married, and i don't think that's right - marriage is a religious/spiritual union, and should be treated as such - it has no place in our government.
another topic frequently discussed: the Equal Protection Clause of the 14th amendment of the U.S. Constitution - shouldn't that trump any sort of amendment banning gay marriage? or shouldn't it just mean that marriage shouldn't have anything to do with the Constitution, and if a married person has the right to put their spouse in charge of medical decisions, then an unmarried person should have the same right to name a person in a similar situation?
i guess the more that i think about it, the more i find myself annoyed with the whole gay marriage thing - it seems as though we're selling ourselves short in asking for the same rights as heterosexual married couples. instead of saying "hey, i'm gay and my girlfriend and i want to get married so we have the same rights as you hetero married people" shouldn't we be saying "everybody deserves the same rights and treatments by the government, regardless of their marital status"?
*shrug* it sucks that this is brought up in an election year to divide the country and try to make us forget that Dubya has totally fucked up this country in so many ways. let's discuss it when everything isn't so fucked up and people can be a bit more rational and level-headed.
Monday, March 01, 2004
the oscars...
woo hoo - Charlize Theron won for Monster. i think she definitely deserved it. i've been hearing more and more about how people are pissed off about the movie and how it's not very accurate as far as being "based on a true story", but looking at it as just a movie reveals a very intensely emotional piece of work.
for everyone else out there that thinks Charlize is hot, here's a link to pix of her nude scenes in movies - Not Safe For Work, obviously. *8-)
i liked Sean Penn's WMD comment - it's cool that he had the balls to make a political comment off the cuff like that, i think. he acted very well in Mystic River, but i must say, that movie is WAAAAY overrated - i kinda hafta wonder if it wouldn't have been as hugely received if it didn't have the "Directed by Clint Eastwood" tag on it.
for everyone else out there that thinks Charlize is hot, here's a link to pix of her nude scenes in movies - Not Safe For Work, obviously. *8-)
i liked Sean Penn's WMD comment - it's cool that he had the balls to make a political comment off the cuff like that, i think. he acted very well in Mystic River, but i must say, that movie is WAAAAY overrated - i kinda hafta wonder if it wouldn't have been as hugely received if it didn't have the "Directed by Clint Eastwood" tag on it.
Saturday, February 28, 2004
lesbo games night...
played games at Out Word Bound & Vic's last night - mostly Vic's, since OWB is now on their "winter hours" schedule and closed up at 8pm. there were 10 of us there - lots of fun. played Taboo and Crack The Case...i just might hafta get Crack The Case on ebay (it's from '93 and is out of print now) - the mystery solving reminds me of the Encyclopedia Brown books i read as a kid.
Tuesday, February 24, 2004
back to "normal"...
crisis mode over, mom was released from the hospital yesterday and went back to work today. they think it was some sort of obstruction in her small bowel - fun fun fun. i've done hospital duty with mom many a time, but i think it was strange for the both of us this time because in the past couple of years, the bulk of trips to the hospital have been because of me - it's usually ME in the bed with mom hovering over me.
Sunday, February 22, 2004
argh...
crappy weekend. no mah jongg because dale was sick and greg was working late. so mom and i got caught up on watching stuff we'd videotaped (amazingly enough, the VCR does occasionally get used) - watched the Dean Cain movie, "The Perfect Husband: The Laci Peterson Story" - yer typical TV movie, i guess...kinda weird because the story's not over and done, the dude's not even gone to trial yet.
watched a few other things, then mom started having some pain in her belly - reminded her of her previous bouts with pancreatitis, primarily because the pain was so horrible, and it came in waves. so it was off to the emergency room at 2am. wouldn't ya know it, we have to go to the ER on the night the computer system's down, so it took FOREVER to get lab results and such - luckily the morphine knocked her out and kept her relatively pain-free. blood work was normal, so then it was time for a CT scan, after mom got to drink a wonderfully disgusting liquid to help the contrast. while mom was getting scanned, i took a break and headed to the cafeteria. on the way back, i ran into dr. priscu, our endocrinologist, and let her know i was there with mom. it was a bit comforting to see her there, even though it was just pure coincidence. she knew what the docs had already said - the pain was lower in her belly than it would be for pancreatitis.
so after the docs said they'd probably let her go after watching her for another hour or so, i KNEW they'd probably end up admitting her - at 11am, i was WHIPPED. no sleep all night, instead i sat around, freaking out and watching mom sleep. so i came home, made a few phone calls, and promptly went to sleep.
so they admitted her into a regular room, thinking there's some sort of bowel obstruction type thing going on. excitement galore.
adam's returning from his european tour this evening, he'll be so thrilled to hear mom's in the hospital.
watched a few other things, then mom started having some pain in her belly - reminded her of her previous bouts with pancreatitis, primarily because the pain was so horrible, and it came in waves. so it was off to the emergency room at 2am. wouldn't ya know it, we have to go to the ER on the night the computer system's down, so it took FOREVER to get lab results and such - luckily the morphine knocked her out and kept her relatively pain-free. blood work was normal, so then it was time for a CT scan, after mom got to drink a wonderfully disgusting liquid to help the contrast. while mom was getting scanned, i took a break and headed to the cafeteria. on the way back, i ran into dr. priscu, our endocrinologist, and let her know i was there with mom. it was a bit comforting to see her there, even though it was just pure coincidence. she knew what the docs had already said - the pain was lower in her belly than it would be for pancreatitis.
so after the docs said they'd probably let her go after watching her for another hour or so, i KNEW they'd probably end up admitting her - at 11am, i was WHIPPED. no sleep all night, instead i sat around, freaking out and watching mom sleep. so i came home, made a few phone calls, and promptly went to sleep.
so they admitted her into a regular room, thinking there's some sort of bowel obstruction type thing going on. excitement galore.
adam's returning from his european tour this evening, he'll be so thrilled to hear mom's in the hospital.
Friday, February 20, 2004
the good thing about group therapy...
...is that it makes you realize you're not as crazy as everyone else out there.
Fridays, 3pm - Stress Management Group. an interesting group of people, that's for sure.
Fridays, 3pm - Stress Management Group. an interesting group of people, that's for sure.
Thursday, February 19, 2004
VNS Update...
no change to the VNS - instead, doc's given me a new seizure pill to add to the list - Trileptal. 3MG of Keppra daily isn't doing it as far as seizure control goes, so we'll try 2 drugs at once. i dunno if the trileptal will be a long-term addition to the list or not, and there's a slight possibility of some problems with side effects - reading the info on the website, it says to tell the doc if you've had problems with tegretol, which i have (in the plain form - XR worked okay with me). i'll cross my fingers and hope i don't feel the anxiety and crankiness and other things i had when i was on generic tegretol. it may also fuck up things with the birth control pills - thank goodness i'm not actually using them for BIRTH CONTROL!
March 17 will be my one year anniversary with the VNS in - it's definitely not a certifiable success, but i'm still willing to give it a chance.
March 17 will be my one year anniversary with the VNS in - it's definitely not a certifiable success, but i'm still willing to give it a chance.
Wednesday, February 18, 2004
Music meme
Music meme:
Step 1: Open your MP3 player.
Step 2: Put all of your music on random.
Step 3: Write down the first 20 songs it plays, no matter how embarrassing.
Step 4: Profit!
alrighty...well, i did this, but only with mp3's i've got on the new computer - i haven't transferred everything over from the old machine yet, so it's probably from about 5-10% of my mp3 collection...
1. Missy Elliott - Work It (Dirty).mp3
2. The The - Kingdom of Rain.mp3
3. Dido - Here With Me.mp3
4. Sheryl Crow - If It Makes You Happy.mp3
5. Erasure - Ship Of Fools.mp3
6. Pet Shop Boys - Send Me An Angel.mp3
7. Counting Crows - Round Here.mp3
8. New Order - True Faith.mp3
9. Dixie Chicks - Strawberry Wine.mp3
10. Thompson Twins - King For A Day.mp3
11. Dixie Chicks with Sheryl Crow - Strong Enough (Live).mp3
12. Thompson Twins - Lies (Extended).mp3
13. Pet Shop Boys - Absolutely Fabulous.mp3
14. Depeche Mode - Megamix (with Erasure, OMD, the Cure, Falco).mp3
15. New Order - Regret.mp3
16. Jellyhead - Crush.mp3
17. Electronic - Get The Message.MP3
18. Monifah -Touch It (Dirty Version).mp3
19. Erasure - Blue Savannah.mp3
20. Kylie Minogue - Can't Get Blue Monday Out Of My Head.mp3
alrighty, now i'm ready for Step 4...
Step 1: Open your MP3 player.
Step 2: Put all of your music on random.
Step 3: Write down the first 20 songs it plays, no matter how embarrassing.
Step 4: Profit!
alrighty...well, i did this, but only with mp3's i've got on the new computer - i haven't transferred everything over from the old machine yet, so it's probably from about 5-10% of my mp3 collection...
1. Missy Elliott - Work It (Dirty).mp3
2. The The - Kingdom of Rain.mp3
3. Dido - Here With Me.mp3
4. Sheryl Crow - If It Makes You Happy.mp3
5. Erasure - Ship Of Fools.mp3
6. Pet Shop Boys - Send Me An Angel.mp3
7. Counting Crows - Round Here.mp3
8. New Order - True Faith.mp3
9. Dixie Chicks - Strawberry Wine.mp3
10. Thompson Twins - King For A Day.mp3
11. Dixie Chicks with Sheryl Crow - Strong Enough (Live).mp3
12. Thompson Twins - Lies (Extended).mp3
13. Pet Shop Boys - Absolutely Fabulous.mp3
14. Depeche Mode - Megamix (with Erasure, OMD, the Cure, Falco).mp3
15. New Order - Regret.mp3
16. Jellyhead - Crush.mp3
17. Electronic - Get The Message.MP3
18. Monifah -Touch It (Dirty Version).mp3
19. Erasure - Blue Savannah.mp3
20. Kylie Minogue - Can't Get Blue Monday Out Of My Head.mp3
alrighty, now i'm ready for Step 4...
Monday, February 16, 2004
VNS Update...
well, not quite - i'll probably be updating my VNS status Thursday, when i have my appointment with dr. mohan. had to schedule an appointment because i had a seizure in the wee hours of this morning. don't think it was as bad as usual, tho i still have a headache after several tylenol doses. dunno if he'll wanna up the dosage of keppra this time, or just give me a bigger jolt. last week i noticed some problems with my sleeping - i'd wake up after being asleep only a couple of hours, and i'd stay awake for quite a while. dunno if sleep disruptions could've brought this on or not. still having the appetite problems as well. *shrug* i'm so very thankful that i hadn't yet started the new diabetes meds dr. priscu prescribed - i'm sure my first thought would've been that they caused some interaction. finishing off the old stuff before i start the new ones.
Sunday, February 15, 2004
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)